Even in my current bubble, avoiding the nonsense shrilling of politics and culture as I look after myself, I still wax lyrical about politics and culture. It’s been my bedrock for many years and it feels good to deconstruct arguments, to pick apart the fallacies of those with whom I heartily disagree. So imagine my surprise this morning when another bleating klaxon of idiocy scraped together their offal into another unintentionally hilarious article about monarchism which highlighted the eternal duality of stupidity and right wing demagogues.
Petronella Wyatt is probably one of the more ignorant amongst our “political writers”. I can’t bring myself to call her a journalist, because reading offcuts of right leaning papers in the UK and then vomiting up another nonsense piece bemoaning your own personal distaste that you don’t fit in to a world that’s kinder than you is to journalism what pouring coffee granules into milk and water is to chemistry- everyone can do it and it’s hardly the most groundbreaking event.
She wrote an article today in The Times, a paper who I’ve never aligned with politically but who I respected once. That respect now lies in a shallow grave, pleading with me to reconsider as I cheerfully shovel clods of dirt upon it, and her missive today is yet more proof that this is the correct move.
Wyatt has decided she is a royal, that she deserves recompense for her family being stopped from ascension, not seeming to realise that… that’s actually how it works, really. If your family were prevented from ascension to the throne, that would be the lord high God, or the people, or politics’ way of saying your family shouldn’t be perched upon one of those gilt chairs I loathe so deeply. She has also decided that she is what she calls an “instinctive monarchist”. Yet in the same article, she decries the man I am loathe to call King Charles. I won’t use the wording she does because reading the W word makes me want to go to sleep for hours at a time. But suffice it to say that she doesn’t like him because he is so very, achingly, deeply politically correct. She finds it offensive, you see, as an “instinctive monarchist”.
No small irony in Wyatt writing an article where she calls for the king she claims to follow so instinctively to be dethroned for her comfort, and no hint of sarcasm in declaring yourself an adherent of monarchism then, without even taking a fresh lungful, complaining about your monarch. Seems your instincts are off somewhere, Petronella.
The equivocation of the right is that you must follow the government, the sensible tory government, you must follow the king because god said so- unless those things displease you, then what?
It seems today that the bulwarks of adherence to right wing echo chambers are louder proponents of anarchism than those lefty wefties they decry so often… for if you demand fealty to a king you also dislike, if you vote in a government laughing at the other option and yet that leads to the NHS collapsing, a financial crisis, cost of living issues and a power vacuum in Westminster as Sunak is led around on a leash by shadowy cabals of conservative MPs, what do you truly stand for?
People like Wyatt are almost satirically confident in their version of how the world should be, and yet it’s no coincidence that as they continue to get exactly what they want- they aren’t happy about it.
The idea of right
Right wing pundits will tell you to vote for Conservatives because they’re sensible, and isn’t it odd how these sensible vote choices lead to corruption, corrosion of public standards, an economy mid-seppuku. Isn’t it odd that they cry out for less political correctness yet scream misogyny at those who declare their war on the LGBT+ hateful.
The right in the UK has lost identity, previously falling behind an adherence to the state, a desperate fight to maintain, with the idea that progress begets degradation. But the right has had the reins for thirteen years- longer, if you look at Blair’s positions on strike legislation, on economic shoreing, on the threads of an unravelling housing market. And yet they will continue to look around, at a world they’ve been in charge of for over ten years, and bemoan it’s state.
Tell me, dear reader. When do you think it will occur to the Petronella Wyatts, to the Liz Trusses, to the Sunaks, the Piers Morgans, the Hartley-Brewers and the Dan Hodges, that they dislike a world which they control. Will it ever occur to them? And should this thunder-crack of realisation ever peal across the empty sky of their collective minds, do you think, dear reader, that there will come the realisation that consistently holding up hypocrisy as a roughly hewn trophy is not the victory that so many of the right wingers we are reluctantly bombarded by claim it to be?
The long and the short of this article is to highlight a point I feel is overdue in addressing by the right wing punditry of the UK: when will you notice that the world you so claim to loathe is one you control?
I am tired of reading the brexiters, furious at the results of their vote, the conservative voters aghast at the conservatives doing what conservatives do best, and most of all I am tired of people who vote, time after time, for the status quo only to find out that keeping things the same means they’ll be just as miserable as they were before. I would entreat these right wing columnists to search the vast gaps between their firing neurones to find some lost thought, long ago discarded, that perhaps if they do not like the world they are in, they step back from control and allow those more aspiration among us to have a go- what’s the worst that can happen after a collapsed relationship with Europe, gutted GDP, 250,000 dead Britons, an NHS that’s being read it’s last rites, an economy with a £100,000 cartoon cutout hole of Liz Truss in it, a law breaking duo of male PMs… We did it your way, you had your shot and to nobody’s surprise, you failed.
Feel free to write your nonsense drudgery about whose head the crown should rest atop- just step away from the controls and let someone with the faintest idea of how to steer take over, because I for one am utterly exhausted with listening to the boring whines of the right, as they sit in a mess they authored.